More Junk In This Pile Than I Ever Imagined:

2 Corinthians 10:5
"...and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ."

There are so many things that come to my mind when I think about obedience.  But the interesting thing is, none of them have to do with my thoughts.  I don't know about you but when I consider the word obedience I tend to find my mind gravitating toward actions: sexual purity, respect, kindness, fidelity, selflessness, honesty...the list could go on and on.

God has been demolishing my definition of obedience by taking my focus from the external to the internal.

You see, I started reading a book last week by Beth Moore called, "Get out of that Pit".   I've never read a book by her before, but I've heard great things about her, particularly from my Christian clients, so I decided to pick it up when I saw it on the sale rack the other day.  I thought, "This will be a good resource to have for my clients...especially the ones who are stuck in a pit".  Addictions, anger, lust, abuse...these are the kind of things I consider a pit.

But, God has a sense of humor.  The book that happened to be on sale last week had nothing to do with my clients...and everything to do with God's client: Me.


You see, I'm a work in progress.  Sometimes I pridefully forget that.  And ironically, that prideful forgetting is a testimony to the fact that God still has a LOT of work to do on me. Though I can be obeying him from the outside...true obedience has less to do with the external and more to do with my internal state.  My heart.  My thoughts.  My attitudes.

It's easy to look good on the outside.  The reality is that in our world, we've all grown accustomed to that.  It's part of wearing the mask.  Do good and you will be good.  But in God's world, there is so much more to it than that.  

The thing I realized this week is that my thoughts are seriously out of control.  Some days my internal world is so misaligned with the idea of obedience to Christ.  I mean, I get that he knows my heart and mind...but it's so much easier to hide that which is between you and God, and hidden from the rest of the world. 

God has really been challenging me to get real with my thoughts.  To share them with trusted friends, and ultimately, to share them with Him.  He's been asking me to weed through the junk that I've allowed myself to focus on and exchange it for truth.  Every bit of it.  And trust me, there's more junk in this pile than I ever imagined...

So, that's where I'm at.  Learning to take my inside and give God the opportunity to allow it to match my outside...I want to take off this mask once and for all.  I want to be real in every sense of the word.    How about you?