Thursday, August 5, 2010

All This Talk About Faith is Making My Life a Little Crazy...

1 Peter 1:7
These have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.

The one thing about choosing to blog about your spiritual life is that it forces you to face any kind of hypocrisy you might have going on.  I mean, I can't write a blog about loving my husband and than turn around and disrespect him.  I can't write about what I am learning about encouragement and in the same breath gossip about a friend or give a bad attitude to the slow cashier at WalMart.

There is something about sharing your spiritual journey with others that keeps you accountable.  I usually love and appreciate that accountability.  But this morning, I hated it...because I almost freaked out...

I got a call this morning that the transferring of my license to work as a professional counselor (from IL to PA) which I had anxiously been awaiting had fallen through.  In short this means no work for at least another 2 months.  At least.  The process had already been delayed a month past what I had planned on...and now it's being delayed indefinitely.  In addition to this, I am left with about 90 phone calls to make and 35 letters to send out (okay, not that many, but it sure feels like it).

I immediately went to my husband to whine and complain and vent my frustrations.  What a waste of my time this had all been.  What a slow department and what a complicated process.  What an annoying state we chose to move dare they.  What about the money we were planning on me earning during this time?

Typically, I probably would have spent the next couple days just pouting my shattered plans desperately trying to figure out how to put the pieces together.  But, miraculously- it lasted only about 5 minutes.

I say miraculously because all this talk about faith is changing some things in me.  All this talk about faith is allowing me to take these moments to really put my faith under a microscope and analyze how I handle these situations of pressure and failure.  In all reality, all this talk about faith is making my life a little crazy - because it's forcing me to new levels of faith and belief that I have never really been to before. 

I called my grandma for a pep talk, and she reminded me about lessons of faith even in these little things.  It's a never ending lesson, really.  Just because I had faith last week doesn't mean I will naturally have it today.  I have to work it out.  I have to refine it and prove it genuine.

Just like Paul was saying to the church- these things happen because God wants to prove your faith- not just to Himself, but to you.  Faith, he says, that is of greater worth than gold.  Faith that at the end of the day, when done the right way will result in nothing less than praising God and drawing nearer to Him.  That's my kind of ending to the day.  I'd rather have that than my pouting and whining any day.

So, here we go- in front of all you readers and friends.  I'm choosing to trust God with this dilemma.  I am choosing to wait on Him, trusting that He must have this under control.  I am choosing to take this "opportunity of unemployment" to give God my time and to give others my time.  To encourage, to minister, and to speak into the lives of those around me.  I know this will work out in His exact timing, and until it does I'm going to seek to praise Him with my life and my attitude...even with the darn licensing lady on the phone:)

Hold me to that.  And then ask yourself- how is God proving your faith right now?

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