What Could Have Been:

2 Corinthians 5:17
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!

I've had the honor of meeting some really incredible men and women over the course of the past few weeks who have really reminded me why I am a follower of Christ.  

Men and women who's lives have been radically changed from darkness into light, from dysfunction into healing, from brokenness into new hope.


It never ceases to amaze me when I hear their stories.  The chains of addictions wrapped around their lives.  Addiction to drugs, sex, relationships.  Addiction to approval, alcohol, and material things.  Broken hearts, destitute spirits, and hopeless futures.  It's amazing to hear the incredible stories of how God took their hurts and their shame...and brought them into something new.

The old has gone, the new has come. 

It reminds me of the power of the love of God through Jesus.  It reminds me of the hope to which I cling.  It reminds me that there is some real power behind the Spirit that is living inside of my heart. 

But it also saddens me.  

I'm saddened because at times, I take my story so lightly.

Sometimes I forget what a privilege it is to be living in the "new".  I've been in relationship with Jesus for most of my adult life.  Having made that choice, and accepting that gift, I've been doing my best to live a life guided my God's Spirit at work in me.  Offering me hope, freedom, and joy ever since.

There is something incredible about that.  There is something incredible to think of who I am today and imagine what could have been if Jesus had not captured my heart. 


My story should cause me to celebrate every day at what should have been...but isn't. 

Thank you Jesus that you enter my present each and every single day, and that you rescue my future. 

The old has gone, the new has come.  May we never take that lightly. 

Addicted to Stuff: Isolated from God

Hebrews 13:12-14
¹² And so Jesus also suffered outside the city gate to make the people holy through his own blood. ¹³ Let us, then, go to him outside the camp, bearing the disgrace he bore. ¹⁴ For here we do not have an enduring city, but we are looking for the city that is to come. 

There are some people that are not distinguished by their intelligence, their compassion, or their appearance...they are distinguished by the anointing of God on their lives.  The Holy Spirit pours out of their body through every action and every word.  John Piper is one of those men.

This morning my husband and I were listening to one of his sermons (click here to listen- you won't regret it!!!).  It rocked our world...as his sermons seem to always do.  He is a man that is so in tune with God, evidenced not only by the words he says, but the way he lives his life.  But I'm not here to talk about my crush on Piper.  I'm here to share a bit about how his sermon touched my life and changed my heart.

This verse in Hebrews was the foundational passage on which his talk was founded.  A passage describing Jesus as a man who went "outside the gate".  Out of His safe place and into risk and danger...in order that we might be saved.  It is a passage that calls us, as believers, to do the same.  It is a passage that begs us to live a life of:

"risk-taking flavor. A gutsy, counter-cultural, war-time flavor to it that makes the average prosperous Americans in your church feel uncomfortable. A strange mixture of tenderness and toughness that keeps worldly people a little off balance. A pervasive summons to something more and something hazardous and something wonderful. A saltiness and brightness, something like the life of Jesus."

A life that considers that lives as though it has nothing to lose....because it considers it's life on this earth as nothing, looking toward the "city that is to come".  A life that, as Piper puts it, "treasures Christ above the accumulation of stuff."

There is so much more to this sermon, but this is where I want to camp out.  In the land of the Rich Young Man.  A man who was so bogged down by STUFF, that he could not fully enter into the life of Christ.  Essentially, it was his stuff that led him to his death.

We can't go far in our relationship with God without taking the time to recognize our addiction to stuff, to things, to material gain.  It's a snare that we are all stuck in, if we are truly honest with ourselves.  I, for one, am no different.

This sermon called me back to a very basic place...a place that I had every so slowly wandered from, without even realizing it.  It called me back to the place that declares everything garbage compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Jesus. 

I don't know how I got here.  Without even realizing it.  I find myself at a place that gets excited more about the material than about the spiritual.  Surrounded by things, and surrounded by people who do the same.  Something has gone terribly wrong. 

Piper explains that the accumulation of health and wealth will NEVER be what draws the world to Jesus.  You see, this is what they seek as well...if Christ is the so called "ticket" to prosperity, well, they can find another way.  You don't need JESUS to have money and things....anyone in the West can get to those things without Him.

True life comes not with the accumulation of treasure, it comes in the changing perspective of what your treasure really is.  For me, that treasure is Jesus.

A treasure that has changed my life in more ways than I could ever begin to explain.  A treasure that has saved me from despair, discouragement and death.  A treasure that begins here in this world, and leads me into another...a treasure that will never end.

Thank you, John Piper, for the reminder of what it means to really follow Christ. 


 

Holiday For Sinners:

Isaiah 53 The Message
But the fact is, it was our pains he carried—
   our disfigurements, all the things wrong with us.
We thought he brought it on himself,
   that God was punishing him for his own failures.
But it was our sins that did that to him,
   that ripped and tore and crushed him—our sins!
He took the punishment, and that made us whole.
   Through his bruises we get healed.
We're all like sheep who've wandered off and gotten lost.
   We've all done our own thing, gone our own way.
And God has piled all our sins, everything we've done wrong,
   on him, on him. 

This past week has been cathartic for me.  I have felt a deep sense of freedom in the act of confession. The past few nights...during the latest hours...God has brought things to my mind that I have been hiding.

I wonder why things like this seem to happen to me so late at night.  Maybe it's because in those moments of deep fatigue that my heart is most vulnerable.  Maybe it's because those are the moments in which my energy is depleted, my guard is down, and I have no strength to fight.  It's by His grace that He meets me in those moments.  Moments in which His love cannot be countered by my pride.

The past few nights God has been revealing to me some things in my life that I really need to change.  He has showed me that I have a strong sense of insecurity that tends to run wild in my life.  A deep feeling of inadequacy that causes me to fear, to covet, to compare.  A feeling that tempts me to lie, to embellish, and to exaggerate.  A feeling that leads me to believe that I am not enough...or that I am small....insignificant, and weak.


My heart is sinful.  And these sins have a tendency to seep into my actions...into my relationships...into my life.

I've spent the past few days talking to my husband about these internal struggles and sins, asking for accountability, prayer, and encouragement.  I've confessed to my friends, in hopes of facing the darkness in my heart.  And now, I find myself confessing to the entire world...anyone who would take the time to read.

I am a sinner.  At the deepest part of who I am there is a constant battle between doing my will...and submitting to His.  I am a sinner, but at the end of the day I'm realizing that this weekend...Easter...is a holiday for people just like me.

Liars.  Thieves.  Adulterers.  Those who can't control their anger.  Those who can't control their addictions.  Crooks.  Drunkards.  Idolaters.  Those struggling with their sexual lusts.  Those caught up in secret sins. 

This weekend is for us.  The sinners.  Those who have realized that they just can't do it on their own.  Those who have searcher their hearts and come to the realization that they are not as "good" as they thought they were...as others thought they were. 

This weekend is for us.  The sinners.  Those who have come to see their great need for a Savior.  A God who would love them to the point of death.  A God who carried our pain, our failures, and our disfigurements.  A God who was crushed so that we could be healed. 

This weekend is for us.  The sinners.  The gift of His precious life.  The hope of freedom, salvation, and peace.  The hope healing...from our pain, our weaknesses, and our sinful states.  The hope of Jesus. 

God Lives in Egypt: A promise of love to the Egyptians...

I have a tendency to be a self-centered Christian, believing that God resides wherever I am.  I have a tendency to limit His presence to areas of the world that resemble peace, liberty, and justice for all. 

But today I was reminded of my great error.  God is not limited by human behaviors.  He is not limited by laws.  He is not bound to certain lands.  His love reaches through all boundaries and barriers.  His presence permeates every part of our world.  Today, I was reminded that He is Omnipresent...He lives in my heart, in my home, in my country...but He also lives in Egypt.

It's hard to imagine God's presence with the chaos that is going on right now in that beloved country of mine.  But today I had a picture of Jesus walking through the streets of Egypt, tears in His eyes.  He was looking at His people in love, whispering to them through the noise that He has a special place in his heart that is just for them. 

Isaiah 19 is a prophetic reminder that God has special plans for this country, and that in the end- after the pain, the chaos, the hurt and the fear...they WILL invite Him in, and He will make His home there:

"The Egyptians will lose heart,
   and I will bring their plans to nothing;
they will consult the idols and the spirits of the dead,
   the mediums and the spiritists.
⁴ I will hand the Egyptians over
   to the power of a cruel master,
and a fierce king will rule over them,”
   declares the Lord, the LORD Almighty.....

When they cry out to the LORD because of their oppressors, he will send them a savior and defender, and he will rescue them. ²¹ So the LORD will make himself known to the Egyptians, and in that day they will acknowledge the LORD. They will worship with sacrifices and grain offerings; they will make vows to the LORD and keep them. ²² The LORD will strike Egypt with a plague; he will strike them and heal them. They will turn to the LORD, and he will respond to their pleas and heal them.

²⁴ In that day Israel will be the third, along with Egypt and Assyria, a blessing^[b] on the earth. ²⁵ The LORD Almighty will bless them, saying, “Blessed be Egypt my people, Assyria my handiwork, and Israel my inheritance.”

In the end, there is always a plan.

Blessed be Egypt, His people.

Me? Not so nice...

Mark 2:17
Jesus said to them, "It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners."

A few days ago I had a discussion with a guy who confessed to me that he "wasn't a very nice person".  My first reaction, of course, was to do away with his insecurities and affirm to him what a nice person I thought he really was.  He went on to explain some of his struggles and the areas in his life that needed work.

Days afterward, I found myself thinking of this interaction.  It's funny how quickly we try to make people feel better.  It's amazing how fast I found myself trying to validate him- ironically, by invalidating what he was saying to me.  It's as though we want others to feel "well" rather than simply allow them to face some of the blemishes in their lives that may truly need to be worked out.

In a way, I envy people like him....because at the end of the day it's the ones who can confess their mistakes and weaknesses that are the ones who have already began walking the road toward help and healing.  It's the ones who can boldly declare their flaws and be REAL who will find the way to salvation. 

I think we could all use a dose of realness in our lives.  A sense of coming forward with who we really are- whether we like it or not, and whether others will like it or not.  It's time we begin to take off the mask of who we believe we should be- and face ourselves as we are.

Many times as Christians we forget that we were the sick ones.  We forget the lives that we have come from and the things that we have left behind.  We forget that we are still traveling on this road of life, having not yet reached perfection but striving toward it day by day by day...until we meet Perfection Itself. 

It's this sense of forgetful pride that can hinder our growth.  It can allow the worm of apathy to make a home in our hearts.  But more dangerously, it can begin to cause a rift between our souls and the Great Healer.  The Healer who came for the sick...

It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick.  May we all have the courage to face our sickness...may we open our eyes to the parts that need healing...and may we constantly find ourselves at the feet of our Great Healer.

Like A Father Carries His Son: Part I

Deuteronomy 1:29-31
²⁹ Then I said to you, "Do not be terrified; do not be afraid of them. ³⁰ The LORD your God, who is going before you, will fight for you, as he did for you in Egypt, before your very eyes, ³¹ and in the desert. There you saw how the LORD your God carried you, as a father carries his son, all the way you went until you reached this place."

The other day my friend and I were discussing how wonderful it is to see a man with his baby.  There is something refreshing about witnessing the strength and safety of a man's arms, holding a vulnerable little baby.  There is something beautiful about seeing the gentleness of a man brought out by the little child in his grasp.  He is utterly responsible for this little one, and in daddy's arms there is no safer place. 

I have always loved this verse because it describes so well the safety we can feel in the arms of God. 

Whether single or married, many times as adults life can get to a place where we feel we are fighting the battle alone.  We are walking along the journey of life feeling depressed and discouraged.  We are at the end of ourselves, broken and weak- having no strength left carry on. 

The unfortunate thing is, many times we try to hide this state of weakness from the world, putting on our disguises and masquerading around as if everything is quite fine.  We are afraid to show weakness.  We are afraid to be vulnerable.  We are afraid to be real.  Somehow, we have learned to believe that Christians should never be broken.  That they should have it all together, all the time.  That discouragement and despair are a sign of a lack of faith or closeness to God.  We have it all wrong. 

As the bible says, Christ did not come for the healthy...but for the sick.  He came for the broken, the weak, the tired and the weary.  He came for those who are able to recognize their need....for those who are able to cry out in despair, like a desperate child raising up his hands for help.  To them that realize they are dying...to them who are willing to lay down their lives.  The beauty is, in Christianity- this is where salvation is found.  It is only when we are at the end of ourselves that God can begin to offer Himself. 

He reaches down and carries us, when we can't walk anymore.  Like a father carries his son, He picks us up off our feet and gently cradles us in His strong arms.  And He doesn't let us down until it's safe.  Until he knows we are strong enough to handle it.  Until we have felt His closeness.  Until we have recognized how important it us to rely on Him. 

My favorite description of this verse is found in Rob Bell's video Nooma: Rain.  He describes an experience he had with his son one day, and how it made this verse come to life.  He describes the beauty that can be found in suffering, because it is in suffering that we are cradled like children in the arms of a loving God. 

What do you need?  Are you at the end of yourself?  May you cry out to Him today.  May you let Him pick you up off your feet and carry you like a Father carries his son. 

"Anne, this is Jesus. Jesus, this is Anne.": On Proper Introductions to Jesus

Mark 16:15
He said to them, "Go into all the world and preach the good news to all creation."

I met a woman today who didn't know who Jesus was.  "That dude with the tan skin and beard?" she questioned.

No clue who he was.  No clue what he wanted.  No clue what significance he had on world history...much less her very own life. 

I was kind of surprised by this response from her.  But more so, I was surprised by the fact that I had known her for 4 months and only now just realized that she had never had any exposure to God's love, for she had never had any exposure to Jesus. 

I guess it's hard to fathom that there are people in America who have grown up clueless to the gospel of Jesus Christ.  I mean, I can understand the Bedouins living in the deserts of Africa or the tribes in the jungle of the Amazon...but, central Illinois? 

It was a sobering moment.  But it got me thinking.  There is a reason that Jesus specifically commanded the disciples to first go to Jerusalem, Judea, Samaria, and then to the ends of the earth.  I used to think that Jesus chose some random towns to send off his disciples.  But there was a strategic plan in choosing those towns in that particular order.  Sharing the gospel had to start locally before it went globally.  It had to start in Jerusalem before it could move on. 

Because, you see, the gospel spreads like wildfire.  It has to start in the center and spread outward if it is going to have the greatest effect on the world. 

Where is the center?   

Wherever you are today. 

That's all it comes down to.  Today.  The town that you are living in, the street that you are walking on, the job that you are working in....the people surrounding you on a day to day to day.  It has to start with them. 

It's great to have a heart for overseas mission, but in all reality, that heart is dead if it hasn't reached individuals across the street.  To burn with passion for the world, you must also burn with passion for your community.  To burn with passion for the gospel, it has to start with the small steps.  It starts with opening your mouth.  It starts with taking the risk.  It starts with letting go of all assumptions and wearing your heart on your sleeve.

I shared the gospel with this young woman today.  We spent a long time chatting about Jesus and answering questions about who He was and why He came.

There was no miraculous transformation at the end of our chat.  No crying, no hugging, no saying the "sinner's prayer".  Nothing dramatic.  But there was one small seed dropped on fertile ground.  One small seed that had never been there before.  One small seed that now has a chance to take root...to grow. 

I may never know what happened to this woman, or the conversation that we had today.  But one thing I do know- Jesus was introduced to someone for the first time.  "Anne, this is Jesus.  Jesus, this is Anne"

And from what I know of Him, He's a pretty charming guy....I think He can take it from here. 

Powerful Stuff- Stay Outta The Way: On Transformation

2 Corinthians 5:17
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!

I've been a Christian for most of my life.  Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful for that fact.  But one thing is for certain, having been exposed to Jesus for so many years of my life, it's easy to become numb to the power that actually exists in Him.

For that very reason, I really enjoy spending time with people who haven't been exposed to Christian culture their entire lives.  It's a needed reminder to me of the life changing transformational power that is only in Christ.  I was spending time with a good friend of mine this weekend who has not been saved her whole life.  Hearing her share of God's transformational work in her life was inspiring.  From old to new.  A being that is now totally unrecognizable from that which it was in a matter of years.    


I have another friend who inspires me.  Almost losing his life to years of drugs and alcohol, completely immersed in addictions and depression- God pulled him out of his mire and called him into a new life.  Just like that.  In an instant.  From old to new.  If you met him now you would never believe the life from which he came. 

God's transformational power....sometimes over a period of years....sometimes instantantaneously.  It never get's old to me.   


It's like the people of Ninevah.  So immersed in their sin, but with one calling of the grace and mercy of God they shed their old selves for the new.  That's the miracle working power of our God.  It's so incredible that just witnessing these transformations is enough to make a person believe. 

If nothing else, it's definitely challenged me.  Because I am so apt to forget the incredible power of Christ, I tend to take on more work than belongs to me.  I am referring to the effort that I put into transforming my own life, but more importantly- I am referring to the effort I put into trying to "help" transform the lives of others. 

Let me give you an example.  I brought a friend to church recently.  I was hoping and praying that everything would go well, from the people greeting her at the door, to the music that was sung, to the "perfect sermon" that the pastor chose to preach that morning.  Everything from where we sat to what we said was fueled by the desire for her to come to know Jesus. 

Ultimately, the desire is a good desire.  My heart breaks for her and I long to see her transformed by the powerful work of Jesus.  I long to see her reach the destiny that God has designed for her.  But I get in the habit of forgetting that Christ's power in her life has nothing to do with me...and everything to do with Christ. 

God's spirit is so powerful.  It cannot be manipulated, fabricated, or created outside of anything but Him.  If you find yourself relying more on your work and the work of those around you than Him than something has gone terribly wrong.  Lay it down.  You are carrying a burden that does not belong to you.  And in the end, when left up to Christ the results are 100% miraculous.  They cannot be ignored or denied.  You will witness the beauty of a new creation where beauty may have seemed an impossibility.  The old had gone the new has come.  That is the power of Christ.  So, to anyone who tends to be like me: do us all a favor....stay out of the way. :)

Don't Be Such A Sissy; Sharing the gospel with Boldness

Romans 1:16
I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes...

As we were walking into our apartment yesterday evening carrying our luggage from the weekend- we were greeted by our neighbors (the neighbors that blast their music starting at 8am, and always seem to have friends over), holding the door open for us as we entered our apartment complex.  Two young men, holding their cigarettes, taking a smoke break.  They asked us how our weekend was, and after a couple more words of small talk we said goodbye and went inside. 

But you know, I couldn't seem to get those young boys off my mind.  I wondered about them that evening...what did they do for a living?  Where they students?  Where they Christians?  Did they ever hear about Jesus and His love for them?

What I couldn't seem to get off my mind was that I let an opportunity to invest in someone's life completely pass.  They were so kind and polite to us...they were the ones who struck up a conversation....and for some reason, I was so preoccupied with my own life that I failed to live my life for others.  Ironically, that's the very thing Jesus calls us to do every day.
 
You know,  I've been thinking about the concept of silence in the body of believers.  I've realized that our silence as Christians can be chalked up to a couple things.  Sometimes we are self absorbed and distracted, sometimes we lack confidence, but sometimes....we're straight up ashamed.  Embarrassed.  Afraid.  We don't want to start the conversation out of fear of what others will think or what they may say.  We're such sissy's sometimes. 

It's so much easier to start up a conversation about the Lord at my Saturday morning ministry...where that's my "ministry"....but what about my neighbors? My coworkers?  My family?  My friends?  For some reason, it's easy to start up a chat about the game, the weather, even politics....but sharing the gospel...that kind of sharing strikes a whole new cord.

I've been practicing boldness in my life lately.  I've been practicing being still, and simply listening to the Spirit's leading in my life.  Once God's Spirit led me to pay for an old man in front of me in line at Walmart, another time It led me to confront a lady about her past and God's presence in her life even through her pain....but more recently, It's led me to talk to a young woman I met about Jesus- and invite her to church. 

She didn't say much and we parted ways.

A few weeks ago, I was sitting in my regular spot at church- and in walks the young woman, an anxious smile on her face- stepping into church for the first time in her life.  What a moment.  I was ecstatic and ashamed.  Ecstatic because she was there....ashamed because I didn't even consider that she might actually come.  We forget the power of the gospel.  That young woman has given her life to the Lord and has attended church ever since.  I am watching God powerfully at work in her life.  It's truly amazing. 

The gospel, which is the power of God to bring salvation to everyone who believes...there is power there....power that is far beyond us....power that we forget to tap into because of our own human frailty.

I want to do something for the boys downstairs.  I don't know what, yet....but I know I want to do something.  Maybe bake them a plate of cookies....maybe strike up a conversation and invite them to church...I have a couple ideas.

But one thing for sure, I want to take pride in the gospel.  I want to believe more and more in the power that is at work beyond my own humanity.  I want to be in tune to God's spirit, and take the opportunities He gives me to proclaim His gospel with boldness and confidence.  I want to have 100% trust that there is power in the words of God's truth....power that will touch lives, power that will move hearts, power that will bring salvation.

On Easter: I'll take the Power and pass on the Suffering

Philippians 3:10-12
I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, to attain to the resurrection from the dead. Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me.

With Easter Sunday just around the corner, this verse seems fitting to meditate on.  There is so much that can be said of Easter, of the holiday that symbolizes the death of Christ culminating in victory over sin, over pain, over death.  There is so much to be said of the Love that was so freely given to save a people who were so undeserving.  There is so much to be said of a God who chose to give up His power and to humble himself, taking on the form of a man in order to bring salvation.

There is so much to be said of such a glorious display of affection...but more-so, there is so much to be learned. 

Paul puts it so well as he reflects on the beautiful and terrible death of our Lord and savior when he says: I want to know Christ and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in His suffering. 

You see, for each one of us....simply reflecting on this glorious display of affection means nothing for the individual soul until one is willing to pursue it.  Until one is willing to accept it.  Until one is willing to allow it to change their lives. 

For those reading this who do not have a relationship with Christ this means one thing: turning to Christ, acknowledging your sinful state, accepting that He so lovingly gave His life to save yours, and pursuing a relationship with him. 

But what about us who already believe?  How can this glorious display of affection continue to change and mold us even after the point of salvation?  How can we get past the point of complacency and being so accustomed to this blessed day that it no longer moves us, no longer challenges us, no longer transforms us?  According to Paul, knowledge brings our salvation from this detrimental apathy.

From the day of  his salvation, Paul spent every moment of his life in pursuit of this one thing: knowledge of Christ.  He wanted to know Christ in every aspect.  He wanted to understand Him in his most powerful moments and in the depths of His suffering.  He understood that true intimacy involved such depths of understanding.  Becoming like the One he loved in every way. He realized that the more he identified with Christ, the greater his appreciation for His sacrifice would be. 

For so many of us, that is an easy thing to say when we are talking in sharing in the power of Christ.  But what about in His suffering?  Do we long to know Christ, even in His suffering?  Do we long to take on a glimpse of the pain of Calvary?  Do we cherish opportunities to humble ourselves as an act of love to those around us?  Do we take the chance to get on our knees and wash the feet of those who have the capacity to betray us?  Do we really allow the pain in our lives to shape us into the face of Christ? 

Can we identify with His broken heart, in pieces for the lost souls surrounding Him?  Can we say in the midst of our betrayal that we long for the Father to forgive our betrayers?  Can we shed tears of anguish for the unity we long to have with our Father? 

Christians, do we long to know Christ in the fellowship of His suffering?

This Easter Sunday, we have a blessed opportunity to gaze upon the sacrifice and victory of our Lord.  We have the opportunity to identify with Him, giving ourselves over to the same power that conquered the grave to be at work in our lives.  We have the opportunity, also, to connect with Him on an even greater level...to join with Him in His suffering.  To allow the glimpse of suffering we have felt or may be feeling this very moment to be yet one more thing that draws us into greater intimacy with our Lord. 

May we take the invitation as we gaze upon the cross and look upon the empty tomb, to share with Him in the power of His resurrection, and have the courage to take part with Him in the fellowship of His suffering. 

For Anyone Who Thinks They're A Saint...

Philippians 1:6
He who began a good work in you will carry it into completion…

I met Tanya last year during one of our visits down into the project housing one Saturday morning.  Tanya is a 17 year old African American girl.  She’s had a hard life.  Most likely, you wouldn’t even believe me if I told you some of the difficulties she’s been through. 

All that to say, there was something special about Tanya, something behind her loud-mouthed personality that rang with genuine passion.  Something behind her tough exterior that exuded with strength.  There was something, just something that drew me to her.  Tanya and I began a really unique friendship.  We started hanging out on a regular basis and little by little she began to entrust me with the pages of her life’s story; some pages sad, some exciting, and some that made me sick to my stomach just hearing about. 

One day last year, outside of her downtown neighborhood, in my car parked on the side of a one way road, Tanya decided that she needed something more.  Right there in my car, she and I prayed, and she gave her heart to Jesus, and her life to the will of God.  It was a beautiful moment, a moment I will never forget. 

I saw Tanya this weekend.  My husband and I took her out to lunch to catch up with her and spend some time with her.  We had talked over the phone, but I hadn’t seen her in over two months with the business of the holiday season. 

As we talked, she told us the stories of how she is changing her life around.  She’s making decisions to take school seriously, to quit the drug addictions that have been holding her back, to focus on restoring her self-esteem and body image, and frankly, to stay away from the friends that had once held her back.  She’s learning to control her anger and forgive.  She’s learning to love herself.

She told me once, “I never really knew how to care about myself til I met you and you showed me how to care…”

Please don’t get me wrong.  I’m not a saint.  And most likely, neither are you.  I’m realizing this more and more and that is the purpose of this post.  So many times we get fooled into thinking that only certain people have the “gifts” of reaching out…as though doing God's work has something to do with us.  I am here to remind you that that is a blatant lie.  I did nothing for this girl but lead her to true Love…and each and every one of us is called to that.  Because at the end of the day, ministry has nothing to do with us, and everything to do with God.  HE is the one that must work in hearts and lives. 

Beyond ALL our gifts and ALL our love, what I’m amazed by is the fact that in two months….I had absolutely nothing to do with this girl’s spiritual growth and maturation.  I wasn’t even aware that it was happening.  It was entirely, completely, 100% the work of God’s spirit in her life….God’s spirit, who entered her heart a few months ago one evening on the side of the road.  God’s spirit who comes with power, reminding us that He is the one who started this…and He is the one who will finish it.

He who began a good work will see it to completion.  Read that.  Get that.  Understand that.  You who may doubt the salvation of your loved one, you who may cry yourself to sleep for fear that your son, daughter, husband or wife will never know the love of Jesus, you whose faith is wavering because you are not seeing the kind of changes you wanted to see…He who began a good work will see it to completion. 

Let down your pride, and put down your human expectations.  This is not your work and it never was.  The only thing asked of you is obedience….the rest is entirely up to Him.  Let him do His job because, I guarantee, the end result will be far more glorious than we could have ever dreamed.

From Christmas to Crucifixion:

1 Peter 2:24
He Himself bore our sins, in His body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness.  By His wounds you have been healed.

Christmas Eve is right around the corner.  There is lots of excitement building.  John and I are planning on sleeping in, opening our gifts to one another, and enjoying a homemade brunch together, before heading off to spend the holidays with family.  There is so much to be grateful for.  So much to find joy in.

This is Christmas.  Or is it?  You see, for so many of us, Christmas has lost it’s sacredness.  It’s lost it’s awe.  It’s lost it’s meaning in our lives.  Don’t get me wrong.  I don’t think it’s wrong to celebrate our holiday traditions, to enjoy friends and family, to attend Santa-themed parties, exchange gifts, and enjoy delicious food. 

But we are missing so much by forgetting the foundation of these joys.  I was reminded of this last weekend, preparing for our Bible Study small group.  We have been going through the book of John and our Christmas study happened to land on John 19- the crucifixion of Christ. 

To be honest, I’m not really accustomed to reading about the Crucifixion around Christmas time.  Frankly, we save that for Good Friday.  How silly we are to compartmentalize our Lord in that way, yet we do.

Reading about the crucifixion that day, there was something sobering in remembering that this was the reason Christ was born.  There was something sacred in realizing that this was the intended end when baby Jesus entered into our world.  This was the purpose.  This was the intent. 

Though Jesus gave His life on the cross that day, in reality, He had given his life 33 years before.  He had already given it the instant he received it- the moment of his precious birth. 

This Christmas, I challenge you to truly contemplate the gift of Christ.  This Christmas, as you gather around your tree, I challenge you to stand in reverence as you worship a Lord who humbled himself and hung on his tree in order to bring salvation.  This Christmas, I challenge you to consider the means by which you have been saved, the life that was given for you to truly live, and the wounds that were inflicted allowing us to be healed.

Lord, more than anything else, we thank you for the gift of Christ. 

Looking for Cheap Hotels:

Romans 10:13-14
Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord shall be saved…How can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard?  And how can they hear without someone preaching to them?

To me, the lesson behind these verses is this: urgency.  Urgency in sharing the message of the gospel.  Urgency in sharing His love.  We are a people who have lost our urgency.  We have grown complacent, content, and cold.  We have allowed other things to take priority.  We have stopped looking for opportunities, and even worse, stopped taking opportunities when they come.

The other day my husband and I were driving back home from our trip to San Francisco.  We had been “hotel-shopping” the whole month before- trying to get the best deals for our stay.  We had learned of every hotel within a 3 mile radius of center-city San Francisco.  On our way back to Peoria, we noticed something for the first time: hotels.  There were dozens of them.  Some, within 500 feet of our apartment. 

The funny thing is, before this week, we wouldn’t have been able to tell you the names of hotels in our area.  We had no idea.  The reason is, we were never looking for them.  We never cared.  It had never pertained to us. 

And so goes with our lives.  We become so used to closing our eyes and ears to the things that concern God.  We are not looking for them.  We miss opportunities that God gives us to share His truth.  We are not listening for them.  We live life in auto-pilot, moving forward one day at a time, forgetting our purpose, forgetting our ultimate destination.  Forgetting the ultimate destinations of those around us.  Our spiritual muscles have atrophied, because we have allowed them to waste away in careless complacency. 

That is the sobering reality.  That is the soil in which our urgency must take root.  We are surrounded by those who will not be saved, because they cannot be saved unless they hear, and they cannot hear unless they are told.  We are surrounded every day by men and women who are desperate for truth, desperate for salvation, as we, brothers and sisters, hold that truth selfishly within our grasp.  Unwilling to share.  Unwilling to go there.  Unwilling to acknowledge and face the urgency of their situation. 

I don’t know about you, but that, my friends, compels me toward serious action. 

I leave you with one question: How will you respond?